Now I know it’s not just me when it comes to reading the signs. You could be dealing with a mastermind who makes you feel as if your crazy when you think you’re being lead on. Sometimes we lets ourselves get lead on and ignore the signs, but I’m gonna walk you through how I found out I was being lead on even though I waited till it was too late and allowed myself to be hurt.
I met a guy one time and it had been a while since I had been hurt. So you know I was at a point in my life where I was content with being single and was kind of excited to get mixed up into the dating world , especially since my last experience with it was through tinder and that wasn’t exactly something I wanted to go back to. I let myself catch feelings for this person, I mean why wouldn’t I?
Not many men nowadays try to take women out on dates or they usually expect something afterwards. Let me tell you how it all went wrong! If a man says he’s not looking for a relationship or that he’s not the relationship type do not assume maybe he’s just not ready yet. Regardless if he brings up that he was hurt in the past and even purses you, because they’ll always feel that way. I’m not saying men don’t change but don’t give yourself that false hope that you could be the reason they change.
I’m telling you I know what I’m talking about I’ve been in love; I’ve dated the hopeless romantic and the man with commitment issues, and they had both been hurt before. I believed I was gonna be the thing in their life that gave them happiness, and that we would become something more, but again I was fed bread crumbs and asked for more in return. Even when I gave them more it wasn’t enough and then you wonder why when you would get further into talking about the future they get scared and your the one who looks crazy cause you’re not willing to just stay stuck on this escalator at one level, you wanna move up, and you can’t seem to find out when they’ll be ready to.
I allowed myself to read my own signs. I was treated like a girlfriend but was always fed the short end of the stick. I met the parents, I met the friends, I even met the family. Yet I was still kept at a distance. I allowed myself to feel things and believe that this person is changing because they wouldn’t usually do these things and worst of all I was also fed the line, “You’re the only one I’m talking to”. Now I still do believe this, but why would a man pursue a woman so much and bring her into his life so much just to push her back when things get close to serious.
I’ll tell you why ladies, because men are cowards. I used to think women didn’t know what we wanted. That’s why we constantly change our minds but its because we don’t wanna settle for less. If a man is feeding you bread crumbs and making you feel like they’ll change, don’t lie to yourself and think that they will. You can’t allow yourself to become consumed with the fantasy of it all turning into a happy ending. I feel this article may come off like, “Do I even know what I’m talking about? You may think, he will change?! I’ve seen it!
So answer my question, what have you seen? Did he ever say the words “I wanna be with you” without the ending part “just not right now”. Did you hear? “I’m not ready right now but maybe years down the line I’ll be”. Now there’s this one line not only I’ve heard but even friends of mine have heard, “I wish I met you sooner”. Is it just me but that tiny voice in your head says well they just need to fall in love with me first and then they’ll change.
Here’s another good example I dated someone a while back who had just gotten out of an engagement, trust me that’s a red flag. I assumed oh since he believes in marriage maybe I’ll be next line if we get serious. We were both hurt in the past and connected on that level. When I tell you I was blind sided like you wouldn’t believe. One day he shifted and acted like I had pushed a relationship he wasn’t ready for. Do not let a man turn the tables on you and make you look like the crazy one.
If you’re ready to break down your barrier with a person and they can’t do the same for you, don’t allow yourself to go all in. Don’t give them that satisfaction. Now if you realize you and this person have the same goals then go for it. I mean in the idea of not wanting a relationship, so your basically down for whatever. But if deep down you know you don’t want that, don’t pretend that you do just to stay with them in some way. So the truth is we all know when were being lead on just take a look at the situation in front of you. Imagine your on an escalator and its stuck, you know you wanna move up or down and its gonna glide either way smoothly or you’re gonna have to put in the work yourself to get to where you wanna go. So is this situation moving up into a relationship or does it keep falling back down into the friend zone.
Never settle for less ladies, regardless if you like whats in front of you, because if your not happy with your situation then don’t let it be your situation anymore.